Asking for a Friend: Help! I talk in my sleep. What should I tell my roommates on an overnight trip?

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  • Each week, we respond to a question from our readers and give advice and resources they can turn to
  • This week, we help a student who wonders how to explain their nighttime habit to people they will be rooming with
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Dear Friend,

I talk in my sleep, and I’ve been struggling with this problem for a few years. I have an overnight trip coming up that involves me rooming with some acquaintances, and I am running out of time to fix the habit. I have considered taping my mouth to try and prevent it, but I don’t think this is safe. How do I approach my roommates about it?

Sincerely, Chatterbox

Who knows? Maybe your roommates like to listen in their sleep. Photo: Shutterstock

Dear Chatterbox,

Understandably, you’re concerned about sleep talking during your overnight trip. It’s important to address the issue in a way that allows you to communicate your needs effectively while respecting your roommates’ comfort and boundaries. Here are some suggestions on how to approach the situation:

1. Reflect on your feelings. Consider how sleep talking makes you feel and its impact on your sleep quality. This self-awareness will help you express your concerns to others.

2. Choose the right time and place to discuss the issue. Make sure your roommates are relaxed and receptive to the conversation.

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3. Be open and honest. Explain your situation and let your roommates know that you sometimes talk in your sleep. Share any concerns you may have about how it could affect their sleep or make them uncomfortable.

4. Provide reassurance. Let your roommates know that you’re actively working on addressing the issue and are open to their suggestions and concerns. Assure them that you want to find a solution that works for everyone.

5. Suggest possible solutions. Ask your roommates if they have any ideas or preferences on managing the situation. For example, you could propose using earplugs or playing white noise to help mask any sounds. You could also explore the option of requesting separate sleeping arrangements, if available.

Maybe your roommates would be willing to wear earplugs for the night. Photo: Shutterstock

6. If sleep talking significantly affects your well-being, or you’re struggling to find a resolution, consider consulting a healthcare professional or a sleep specialist who can provide further guidance and support.

Open communication and understanding are key when addressing topics like this. You can navigate the situation more effectively by approaching the conversation with empathy and willingness to find a solution together. It’s likely that your roommates won’t be upset and will appreciate that you let them know in advance so there aren’t any surprises!

Hope that helps, Friend of a Friend

This question was answered by Ken Fung, clinical psychologist and director of therapy and counselling at The Jadis Blurton Family Development Center and founder of Your Relationship Clinic.

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