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Rural Hong Kong’s superslow broadband is enough to get anyone’s goat. Illustration: Maria Riviera

I’ve just spent some time in the Third World, and it was harrowing: potholed roads, packs of wild dogs, scowling villagers stripped to the waist as they strangle chickens on their doorsteps, and confused huddles of swivel-eyed expats who have clearly been away from civilisation for too long.

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OK, so maybe it wasn’t the best idea to have a mini-break in Sai Kung Country Park. But I needed somewhere to work in peace and thought it might be ideal, until I remembered the most Third World thing about it: the internet.

Here, as in much of the New Territories, PCCW has the audacity to charge HK$300-plus a month for internet with “speeds” of about 6.8 megabits per second. If residents want fibre broadband, they have to club together with neighbours and shell out tens of thousands of dollars to pay for the infra­structure, which PCCW will then gleefully and indefinitely profit from. So most just put up with it.

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And, for the education of island folk who get superfast Wi-fi for less because of a thing called competition, here’s how it works: to send an email, click send, go and make a cup of tea, then come back to see if it’s gone yet. To send an email with an attachment, click send, then drive into town to do your weekly shop, maybe take in a film and hope for the best.

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