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Rising divorce rate only underscores the value of a good marriage

Amy Wu says her recent divorce has taught her the folly of rushing into a partnership without taking the time to first build a solid foundation, or treating the institution with the respect it’s due

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Newlywed couples attend a mass wedding ceremony in South Korea. Photo: Reuters

I got married in May 2014. It was a quiet, private affair. We were part of a lengthy queue of couples waiting to say “I do” at city hall.

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In less than 40 minutes, we were officially husband and wife. There was no symbolic rainbow or fireworks, but by making it legal, everything had changed. The first words out of my husband’s mouth were, “Now you’re an old married lady.” He had been married before.

I felt liberated. Sadly, but practically, I’d checked off what was the Mount Everest of accomplishments for women universally – I had got hitched, I was taken. I could exhale.

Three months later, when we held a ceremony with an officiant and 10 banquet tables of guests, I took the vows literally. No one enters a marriage wanting it to fail.

In the next 18 months, what I came to understand was marriage can, sadly, remain a piece of paper if it is rushed into. I kicked myself for not asking the essential questions: why marriage? And, why this partner?

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A woman wearing a wedding dress runs at the “Half-Naked Marathon” at Olympic Forest park in Beijing. What girl doesn’t dream of walking up the aisle in a white dress? Photo: Reuters
A woman wearing a wedding dress runs at the “Half-Naked Marathon” at Olympic Forest park in Beijing. What girl doesn’t dream of walking up the aisle in a white dress? Photo: Reuters
Marriage was a social norm and a rite of passage. What girl doesn’t dream of walking up the aisle in a white dress? The perks of marriage seemed to outweigh those of being solo.
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